I'll Never Forget The Day We Met
by Talk-Dirty-To-Me-Levi
Summary: Jesus Christ - Why did I write this? Crack fic I guess. Eren has a problem and seeks medical help, Levi is the nurse he sees in A&E.


**A/N:** I am soooo sorry for subjecting you to this. I have no excuse, I just felt like writing this...please forgive me. I don't even know why I'm posting it.

 **I'll Never Forget The Day We Met**

Feeling completely and utterly mortified, Eren followed the nurse into an empty cubicle.

Of all the stupid things to happen to him, this was definitely the worst - it was all his own fault too. He was beyond mortified. It did not help that the male nurse was the hottest man Eren had ever laid eyes on. He was short, dark hair with an undercut, his face serious, showing that he was bored, overworked and fed up with dealing with admissions in A&E.

He closed the curtains and asked Eren what was wrong, "The admissions said you refused to tell them," he stated unimpressed.

Eren adverted his eyes, he needed help, that was for sure, but why did it have to be this hot guy, "Can I request a female nurse?" he mumbled almost too low for the man to hear.

"No," came the abrupt answer, "We're extremely busy tonight, and I am the only one available. You either tell me what is wrong so I can do my job, or you go home."

Levi was being harsh he knew, but it was true, they were short staffed and busy. He could hazard a guess what was wrong with the brunette in front of him. He came into A&E with that bow-legged wobble and had declined to sit down.

Eren cringed, fuck this was humiliating, "I-I..." he paused, "Y-you see I've been experimenting lately. And I was...um...feeling horny.." Eren groaned, "fucking hell," he complained out loud to himself before carrying on, "I needed something more than just my fingers, so I...I searched my house for something random to use, and well now it's stuck." He rushed out the last part. His head remaining firmly down and his eyes closed tightly.

"Not the first person this has happened to, and you certainly won't be the last," Levi remarked coolly, no hint of any awkwardness or second-hand embarrassment. In fact, Levi had not only had the pleasure - note heavy sarcasm - of fishing out random objects from two people, he had seen various x-rays from other staff showing numerous objects up people's rectums.

Eren chanced a glance at him, he met Eren's gaze, an eyebrow arched, "What is it?" he asked, clearly meaning what object did Eren deem suitable to shove up his arse for pleasure.

Eren bit his bottom lip, this nurse may have experienced a situation like this before, but it was his first time and he was struggling.

"Kid, you made a mistake. Next time just buy some sex toys, now please tell me what it is so I can assess if it is harmful or toxic to you." Levi grit out. The A&E department was jammed, he had no time for this, even if the young lad was easy on the eye, and appeared adorable as he blushed, biting his lower lip.

The other patients he had to deal with regarding a similar matter, were not appealing to him, he did not find them attractive. The guy stood before him was delectable. The visuals his words had created were quite something, Levi may even indulge in a wank when his shift was over, thinking of this attractive patient fingering himself, or sliding a dildo in and out, as his face became flushed from pleasure and shame.

God - Levi needed to get laid.

"I've ordered some toys," Eren blurted feeling defensive, "They have not arrived yet and I was desperate to..."

Levi closed his eyes slowly, "Please, what is it?" cutting him off before he caused Levi to get a semi.

Eren averted his eyes, looking at a poster about the importance of handwashing, "An end of an electric toothbrush." He reluctantly confessed.

Levi's eyebrows shot up in surprise, "Going for the extra sensation of vibration were you?" he knew he was speaking out of line, that this was no way for a professional nurse to speak to a patient. However, he suspected that - he glanced at the chart - Eren, would not make a formal complaint.

Eren sighed, "Yeah, I guess. Hadn't gotten that far, before, you know..." he made a hand gesture to indicate something being pulled upwards.

Levi snorted, Eren's head shot up, his eyes meeting Levi's, "Some words of wisdom, never use anything that does not have a flat base, or some form of loop to pull out. Was this your first experience too?" Again he was being inappropriate, but he was dying to know. Eren was innocent and fuck did that not make Levi want to teach him a thing or two.

Eren nodded then softly admitted, "Yeah, I'd only used my own fingers before, but I wanted something that penetrated deeper, I wanted more - you know?"

Fuck this moron was doing funny things to Levi.

Strangely this was not new for him, the department on average got at least five a week with non-kosher shit up their arse and it's tedious. The only real pleasure in treating patients with foreign objects in their anus is listening to their excuses. It was refreshing hearing Eren being honest. No excuses, no lies - straight up admitting that he wanted to pleasure himself and made a mistake, which resulted in him being here.

"Read a book, fuck, google this shit, you need to be a bit more clued in before you do crazy stuff like this," Levi stated dumbfounded.

"I know," Eren agreed, "Please, can we just...dunno...get this fucking thing out of me." It did not hurt, but he felt uneasy knowing it was still inside of him.

"We need to take you down to the x-ray department so we can see the positioning of it, and then we will know the best way to go about getting it out," Levi explained, returning to his professional tone.

"Shit, that means more people will know," Eren blurted horrified.

"Hate to break it to you, but as soon as you're out of earshot the technicians will be showing everyone that x-ray." Levi honestly admitted, it was not like Eren would do anything about it, besides it was his word against Levi's, not to mention the process of complaining would cause more people to know about it, and that was the last thing Eren wanted.

Eren groaned, "Jesus christ," he knew it was inevitable, but fucking hell it was awful. He wanted this thing out of him, so he could go hide under a rock for the rest of eternity.

To add insult to injury, Levi announced, "Then normally we'll just bend you over and dive in to pull it out, but if we can't get a good grip, we'll put you under."

Eren flung his hands up to cover his face, why did he have to have the vulgar, brutally honest and insensitive nurse? Deep down he appreciated the honesty, no pussy footing around, Eren now knew exactly what to expect, but the nurse could maybe work on his delivery.

Shielding his face out of pure shame and embarrassment, "This has killed the mood," he joked. He always made jokes when he felt awkward.

To his astonishment, the nurse gave a short dry laugh, "Yep, nothing like a trip to A&E to have a hand wiggling around inside of you to ruin your night. Although we had one patient once who kept returning with various things up his rectum, he got off on having it removed or something - strange man." Levi remarked, unsure why he was saying all of this, maybe to make Eren realise, that yes it was embarrassing, but it was not the end of the world. The object was not causing him pain, and he had not tried to remove it himself making it worse, it would soon be out and he'll be free to safely seek anal stimulation.

After Eren changed into the awful hospital robes, he had an x-ray, once the x-ray was examined, the nurse informed him that it should be relatively simple to remove the foreign object.

He had Eren lay on his side on the bed, legs bent and facing away from him. Eren had grabbed hold of his hoodie jumper, burying his face out of sheer humiliation. There was no way he could show his face, even if he was facing the opposite way. Thank fuck he did not get caught leaving the house by his parents or Mikasa, otherwise, they would have insisted on being here. He would take this to his grave. Just the fit nurse and various other hospital staff will ever know about this.

Levi had a job to do, he could not entertain the thought that he was currently having, about the rather shapely and perfect bottom facing him. Never before had he gotten any enjoyment out of sticking his finger up a patient's rectum. He was not exactly enjoying it now, he was professional after all, but he could not help but acknowledge that he found Eren attractive, that Eren had a nice ass, and that if this was under different circumstances he would work Eren to the point of ecstasy with just his fingers.

Alas, this was not under different circumstances, he needed to get this done, so Eren could leave and he could complete the paperwork before moving onto the next patient.

He inserted his gloved fingers up Eren's anal passage, the tight muscles trying to push out the intrusion, "This may be uncomfortable," Levi stated matter of factly.

No reply, Eren had hidden his face in his jumper - how sweet.

After assessing the situation, he knew he could probably retrieve it easily enough. After a rectal speculum was inserted, he had a visual on the end of the toothbrush. Using forceps he slowly and carefully pulled it out, the speculum following soon after.

"All done," Levi announced, "You may experience slight spotting of blood, do not hesitate to visit your GP if anything worries you." He explained.

Eren mumbled a 'thanks' behind his covered face, then something Levi could not make out.

"You're going to have to uncover your face I cannot understand you," Levi snapped.

Eren slowly pulled the jumper away, not daring to look at Levi, "I said, am I free to leave?"

"Sure," Levi confirmed, "But make sure you wait a bit before you test out your new toys when they arrive, you have internal damage - nothing major, but give yourself time to heal."

Eren had sat up, "I'm not planning on having anything up there for a very long time," Eren confessed, this had set him back, no way was he even attempting it, he did not care if his toys were safer.

"Shame," Levi stated, making sure to meet Eren's eyes as he said it.

Eren's eyes widened comically and he was blushing once more, "Um..."

"Don't have a heart attack, you don't need to answer. Best of luck to you." Levi announced, taking Eren's file and leaving.

Six months after his humiliating visit to the A&E department, Eren was out at a gay club with his friends. He had in fact gotten over being scared, had since used his toys numerous times, thankfully none of those times resulted in a trip to the hospital.

He was waiting at the bar to be served, glancing out across the room watching his friends have a good time. He saw that Armin had been approached by a tall blond man, who was brazenly flirting with him. Armin seemed to be loving every second. Eren turned to the guy's friend and froze. There stood looking completely bored, was the nurse who had extracted the foreign object from him. FUCK!

It shocking to see him, the memories of that day flooding back, he began to feel panicked, what if he had told his friend, or worse still, what if he recognised Eren and he tells Eren's friends?

He had been far too busy having a meltdown because of his sudden appearance, he had not noticed that he had moved to stand next to him.

"Hey," he called.

Eren jumped, "Oh hi," fuck he cannot pretend he did not know him, or that he had the wrong guy, that he was not Eren Yeager.

"It seems my friend and your friend are having a moment," Levi pointed out.

"Uh...yeah." Eren nervously replied, feeling torn between running away and staying just to hear the man speak. His voice was what an orgasm would sound like if it could talk.

"Levi, by the way." He stated, trying to engage Eren in conversation.

"Fancy a drink, Levi?" Eren asked. The only way to get past this embarrassment was to get wasted Eren had decided.

Levi accepted and once served they headed for a booth of their own, Armin and Erwin seemed a little too preoccupied to want company.

By some miracle they actually had a decent conversation, it was not forced, and once Eren let go of how they originally met he found he liked Levi's company and was still attracted to him.

After a few more drinks Eren drunkenly confessed, "You know, I was devastated, there I was in this humiliating situation and who do I get - 'Mr Make You Come In Your Pants With One Look!' Jesus Christ, it was just my damn luck."

Levi arched a brow, "One look huh?"

Eren groaned, "Stop it, you must know what effect that has on people?!"

"Yeah, it usually scares them," Levi stated.

"Scares them!" Eren exclaimed, "It makes me want to sit on your face."

Levi snorted, "That could be arranged,"

Eren gaped at him, "What? You like me too?" he ignored the part of his brain that was mocking him for sounding like a preteen with a crush.

Levi dropped his hand to Eren's knee, slowly moving it up towards his groin, caressing his inner thigh, he leant in, whispering, "I like you too," he moved his mouth to trail kisses behind Eren's ear and down his neck.

Eren shuddered, his body already reacting to the most basic of touches, "You need to get me out of here, now," Eren breathed, desperate to start whatever this was.

Levi pulled away from Eren's neck, moving to place a firm kiss to his lips, "As you wish," he stood, confidently walking out knowing full well that Eren was following.

He was about to teach Eren a thing or two, things that would blow his mind.


End file.
